there’s this game series, harvest moon, that’s been around for like 10 years. it’s like a combination virtual farm/dating game. i’ve been playing it pretty much since it’s been around and have always given my fake farms stupid names, like “butt ranch” or “cow town” or “weed grow”. when i moved in with my boyfriend, he had to start putting up with me playing fake farm after fake farm with stupid fake names. i’ve been given the opportunity for a real farm, and i only get to name it once, so it better be the best name i can think of.

A REENACTMENT OF THE DISCUSSION WITH A FRIEND OVER WHAT TO NAME MY FARM, IN MY OWN WORDS.

me: dude whats up

ameen: I ONLY LIKE CAPITAL LETTERS AND 60’S POP MUSIC AND CAMERAS

me: i got my farm what do i call it

ameen: LOL CALL IT HOT DOG FARM

me: oh man i should totally grow hot dogs

ameen: YEAH JUST PLANT THEM AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS

me: do you think they are vines or bushes, like would i need a trellis?

ameen: NAW THEY GROW DOWN LIKE POTATOES

me: oh sweet

me: wait hot dog farm is too simple

me: corn dog ranch

ameen: YEAH

me: corn dog ranch!

ameen: YOU’RE LIKE THE COOLEST PERSON EVER

me: thanks but i already knew that

ameen: HOW DO I TURN OFF CAPS LOCK